Life can be rough. We all know that there are times that are rougher than others. We may be stressed, anxious, and have difficult emotions. What we may need to do is work on our wellness. But we also may feel guilty taking time for ourselves or practicing self-care when so much needs to be done elsewhere. STOP. It is vitally important for us to find ways to cope not only with the small day-to-day problems like grocery lines or slow traffic, but during those really difficult times in life. It is okay to think about ourselves. We can still do that while caring for and helping others. In fact, if we don’t take care of ourselves, we may be unable to help someone else.
Self-management is the use of many different skills or tools to manage behaviors, thoughts, and emotions. Some of these can be related to chronic health conditions and how to manage changes associated with them in order to carry out everyday activities. Other self-management skills can be used in other areas of life beyond chronic conditions. Some of these tools work better than others. It is important to try and see what works because everyone is different. This blog talks about relaxation techniques that use our mind to manage stress and negative emotions.
What does relaxation help?
Reduces anxiety and stress
Promotes emotional health
Helps focus
Enhances coping skills
Gives us more energy
Mindfulness means paying close attention to our thoughts and feelings in that moment. Life is so busy that so many people aren’t really present. We may seem like we are running on autopilot to do our job, chauffeur the kids to their activities, make dinner, and get put on repeat for the next day. We jump around from thought to thought. We are impatient. Being mindful encourages us to pay attention to our thoughts, actions, and how our body reacts to them at the time they are happening. We don’t judge these moments as happy, sad, good, bad or react negatively to them. We realize they are there by observing them. Being mindful can help us realize how our mind races back and forth to the past or the future or a worry without being in the moment. Being in the moment helps us slow down and calm down.
Mindfulness can be practiced anywhere, like waiting in a grocery store line. Focus on becoming more aware of what is going on in that moment. We may hear people moving past with their shopping carts, voices conversing negatively or positively, children crying, cash registers beeping. We may see shoppers smiling or frowning, clerks packing groceries, people putting money into the lottery machine. We accept things just as they are. No judgment. This can be useful for something like healthy eating, too. Focus attention on each bite of food thinking about the taste and texture and flavor. Stop when our body lets us know it is full. This is mindful eating.
Guided imagery is imagining positive imaginary scenarios like a daydream we control to put our self into amore relaxed state of mind. It’s thinking about an image that is peaceful and soothing and pleasant. Close our eyes and breathe in a few slow and deep breaths. In through the nose and out through the mouth. Use as much detail as possible and all of our senses. If a favorite place to be on vacation is a beach, then what comes to mind when thinking about being there? Feel the smooths and on our feet as we walk along the beach. Listen to the incoming waves and watch them roll over our feet, cooling them. Feel the warm sun on our back as we walk. Hear the sounds of children laughing as they look for shells or play with toys. Look up to the sky and notice the seagulls flying and squawking, and the pelicans diving for fish. Do we smell salty air? Are there ships in the distance? Focus on as much detail as possible. Use all of the senses. If something comes to mind that we don’t like or causes distress, then throw it out to sea. Redirect the mind. Instead, think about the taste of the cold Margarita that will be waiting once we get back to the hotel pool. The mind drifts and the body relaxes.
There are scripts for using this technique or make up one as was done above. Whether we are actually at the beach practicing mindfulness or using guided imagery to imagine we are at the beach, we are in the moment and hopefully relaxing. Enjoy being in the moment and smile. Vacations, either real or imagined, don’t last!
Visualization is closely related to guided imagery to relieve problematic symptoms. It helps create a picture of us doing something we like or want to do. The mind creates images that we see. It helps build confidence. During the current Paris Olympics, television commentators discussed how some of the athletes use visualization to get their mind in control before an event as the athletes think about the exact way that they want to perform. Interesting stuff for sure!
Distraction can help train the mind to focus on other things besides the stress or discomfort that we are experiencing. We are not ignoring symptoms but are choosing not to let them bein control. Since our mind can’t focus well on more than one thing at a time, we are able to turn off the other one that is causing us distress. There are aplenty of things that could be tried to help with short-term distraction such as counting backwards by twos, thinking of a kind of bird for each letter in the alphabet, trying to remember words to a favorite song as examples. This technique may also help with sleep problems. If we let a distressing thought creep in, then say “stop” either out loud or in our mind. Longer term distraction involves focusing on an activity such as cooking, gardening, painting, or going out to a movie, for example.
Positive self-talk helps us have control over a situation with helpful thinking. It can help us feel stronger. We are always talking to ourselves. Positive self-talk can help control how our mind thinks about events and how we feel. We can then explore what actions can be taken. Part of this can be taking negative thoughts and looking for something positive in those thoughts instead. This can be hard at first but gets easier the more it is done. Some people put positive affirmations inwriting and place them around their home to help.
Relaxation techniques can also include doing things we like to do. These are tools that can shift our mind and mood to a better place. It is important for our own well-being to add pleasurable activities to the week. Think about the activities that help with relaxation.
They might include:
Connecting to something larger than ourselves: prayer, spirituality, meditation
Creativity with cooking, crafting, drawing, gardening, painting
Finding a stress reduction program
Focusing on breathing techniques, yoga, meditation
Getting a massage or facial
Getting a good night’s sleep
Going out to dinner to a favorite place
Journaling
Listening to music or making our own music
Napping
Playing with a child or pet
Practicing gratitude or acts of kindness
Reading books on subjects we enjoy or trying a self-care book
Seeing or calling a friend
Spending time outside in nature or in a park
Taking a break from technology
Walking, bike riding, working out
Watching a movie
Volunteering
Busy times and downright bad times. We all have our share. They are a part of life. Techniques that use our mind are away to relax. Our problems and worries may not actually go away, but we get a break from them. If we feel like more help is needed, it is okay to ask for support and treatment from a primary care provider or mental health professional. Be kind to ourselves just as we seek to be kind to others. We are worth it.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/mindfulness
https://www.webmd.com/balance/what-to-know-about-guided-imagery
